tokbox rox!

tokbox is exactly the site i was searching for & thank God i discovered it right on time. at time when i m in dire need of a site that supports instant messaging plus video call but minus the fuss of downloading/installing. last nite was huge proof. after a few fights & multiple sulking on his side, finally i get to spend quality time with his royal sweetness via video call while we chat using instant message. the distance between us didn't seem that far after all. right now, i m more confident with what we have and i have tokbox to thank for that.

so check out: http://www.tokbox.com/. u'll gonna love it. i know i do.

my first tag..:)

i've been tagged! *jumping with joy* here's a few trivial facts bout me. read on.

• I LOVE OPRAH - i can watch oprah reruns over & over again. she covers every topic relating to human beings. im watching an episode right now as of writing. about dogs in puppy mills. heartbreaking.

• I AM NOT THE HOMELY TYPE - girls are supposed to be right? but honestly i m not. i can't stand being at home. it's like, town is beckoning me, calling out for me to spend my time outside. never mind if i don't have the money to spend, just so i can get outside of the house i m content.

• I AM ACTUALLY SOFT HEARTED - i may have the tough exterior look but on the inside, i m easily touched. i cry at times. sometimes for no reason, just to let the repressed feelings out.

• I AM A CAT PERSON - i just love cats. i love the touch of their fur & the sound of their purring. i feel at peace whenever i m with one. cats, unlike humans never judged me, only loved me unconditonally.

• I HATE SLOWPOKES - yup. especially on fast lanes. and yeah, i curse. damn all those snails on the roads. move it, biatch! F**K! u'll dread sitting beside me in the car.

• I NEVER MISSED AN ISSUE OF CLEO - i m an avid reader of CLEO magazine. and i m running out of space to keep them. room to spare, anyone?

• I DON'T READ MALAY NOVELS - i tried, believe me i do but i just can't take it. i do love my mother tongue but not the novels.

• TECH SAVVY, I M NOT - i m into gadgets & what's out and about with technology but that's about it. i can operate basic features. not the extended ones. i'd get frustrated with myself right after.

• I TRIED EVERY NEW THINGS POSSIBLE - i m easily attracted to anything new. i just have to have my hands on them. food especially. explains the weight issue i'm facing. :D

• SEXY LINGERIES, I LIKE! - u can see me oogling at all the sexy lingeries with my eyes gleaming. love the feel of silk & satin on my body. have a few hidden in my closet for personal viewing. i just can't wait to get married! ;p

im feeling lovey dovey today! :)

a song just for
my RAY of sunshine..:)

FLAWS AND ALL

I'm a train wreck in the morning
I'm a bitch in the afternoon
Every now and then without warning
I can be really mean towards you

I'm a puzzle yes indeed
Ever complex in every way
And all the pieces aren't even in the box
And yet, you see the picture clear as day.

[Chorus]I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you [3x]

I neglect you when I'm working
When I need attention I tend to nag
I'm a host of imperfection
And you see past all that

I'm a peasant by some standards
But in your eyes I'm a queen
You see potential in all my flaws
And that's exactly what I need.

[Chorus]I don't know why you love me
And that's why I love you
You catch me when I fall
Accept me flaws and all
And that's why I love you [3x]

dear sayang..

honey,

i miss u so much today. it feels like forever since we last talked, although it has only been a few days..

i understand, u must have been very busy since ur workload is piling high considering what u're doing for a living..

but u never failed to make me feel special with ur own ways. blushing is an understatement for how u make me feel each & every time. and all the silly arguments are just plain silly since i just couldn't be mad at u for long..

it does feel surreal to actually been knowing u for almost 2 years & how i still feel the same for you right until now..

it's not all wishful thinking though. because i do get frustrated & sometimes almost gave up on us since the distance and not forgetting the different timezone is killing me but u have been patient, constantly convincing me if we put our hearts to it, it'll work out like we hoped..

i m grateful that u found me when no one else was looking..

1 4 3..
still does & always will..

i don't feel so good :(

today i had to take a day off from work. diarrhoea & vomitting. must be the worst combination ever! i refuse to take any meds though coz i don't like to be dependent on them. the only reason i go to the clinic is to get my sick leave. that's it. but no worries, i'm recovering as we speak. a day's rest is enough for me.

ps: no pics on this entry, i look horrible with my pale face & out-of-bed hair (shivers!)

shia, marry me! ^_~

i m in no position to write a review here but EAGLE EYE is awesome! i love the whole storyline, right from A-Z. MICHELLE MONAGHAN is gorgeous and i can't believe i'm watching the same SHIA LABEOUF from Even Stevens coz he was so puny, a troublemaker & quite a loser back then. but he had grown into a very handsome young man with tremendous talent. i'm definitely looking forward for his future films. SHIA, u're the man! ;)

food, glorious food!

the other day, japanese food sounded like a pretty good idea to feed our grumbling tummies so anne, mus & myself headed down to SUSHI KING. we had sushis on the conveyor belt (i just love watching them go round & round.weird m i?haha..) & ordered some ala carte dishes as well. we had unagi (my favourite!), california temaki, spider roll, takoyaki & a few others which names i hardly could pronounce. nevertheless, i just love japanese food since it's fulfilling minus the gagging effect. here's a few pics of that day. tempted? ;p

pissed off :|

i m using yahoo messenger for vista (beta version) at the moment.

seriously, I LOATHE IT!

for all those yahoo geniuses, no pun intended.

it's just that i'm not really a tech savvy kind of person & thingamajigs sometimes freak me out.

as long as i can have a go with all the basic features, i m content. just like a little kid granted permission to have anything sugary at dinnertime.

all i ever wanted is to be able to have an intimate heart to heart conversation (webcam included) with that special someone.

i should 'kiss my ass goodbye' (quoted from lynn) since the new yahoo messenger doesnt have that feature. yet.

darn.

From a Culture of Violence to a Culture of Peace: Transforming the Human Spirit

My trip to The Spring yesterday was really an eye opener. Afar, something caught my eyes right from the start. At first I couldn’t make out the images but with much scrutiny & the help of the captions provided, I finally understood what I was actually staring at. Casualties from the Hiroshima & Nagasaki atomic bombings. They were graphic & definitely heart-wrenching. My eyes glazed at the sight of charred remains of humans & the repercussions of the tragedy: diseases caused by heat rays & radiation.

One story that really tugged on my heart strings was of Sadako Sasaki & the paper cranes. She was one of the many victims of the Hiroshima bombing: she was 2 years old at the time of tragedy & lived 1 mile from ground zero. She survived but 10 years later, diagnosed with leukemia. She was hospitalized and given the most, a year to live. Spurred on by the Japanese saying that one who folded 1,000 cranes will be granted a wish, a wish she desperately wanted to come true that is for her to be cured, she started folding paper cranes whenever she could. But she fell short of her goal of folding 1,000 cranes, having folded only 644 before her death.

Do you know that there are 27 000 nuclear weapons developed & only 4 are needed to destroy this entirely world? Either do I. How ignorant I have been. That’s why I was glad to be at the Human Spirit Exhibition & read all the facts and see it with my own eyes. I signed the petition of peace and place a red dove sticker representing world peace on Anti Nuclear Weapons banner. Emotional it was but I left with a warm & fuzzy feeling. Small as it may look, I did contribute something. How about u?

:: EVERY ONE OF US CAN MAKE A CONTRIBUTION. AND QUITE OFTEN WE ARE LOOKING FOR THE BIG THINGS AND FORGET THAT, WHEREVER WE ARE, WE CAN MAKE A CONTRIBUTION. SOMETIMES I TELL MYSELF, I MAY ONLY BE PLANTING A TREE HERE, BUT JUST IMAGINE WHAT’S HAPPENING IF THERE ARE BILLIONS OF PEOPLE OUT THERE DOING SOMETHING. JUST IMAGINE THE POWER OF WHAT WE CAN DO:: Wangari Maathai, Nobel Peace Laureate

a letter for u, sis

Dear Ina,
Today's the day u'll be sitting for PMR. Today until the 17th. 5 days that could literally change ur whole course of life. It may sound terrifying & i didn't mean to scare u but it's true. What u get in this exam will determine what u will do in the future..

U are very lucky (compared to the rest of us) to be born at times when everything is served on a silver platter. U don't have to do much to get what u want, unlike us who we really had to outdo each other in order to impress Mak & Bapak, to prove that we are worthy of being their offspring. But just because u had it easy, that doesn't mean u can take any of it for granted. Please don't 'cause as ur big sis i want u to succeed on ur own terms & be proud of ur own achievements..

In the future, temptations will be aplenty but if u put ur mind to it, i'm sure u'll be strong enough to firmly refuse. Distractions will to come in different forms but don't get over ur head too much. Obstacles are inevitable but just consider them as life lessons, regardless how minor or major they are..

I have total faith in u 'cause i believe u have the potential just like any other person to succeed in life.ALL THE BEST IN THIS EXAM & LIFE..

Luv,
Kak Ayang

better in time

“I fell in love or I thought I did (my closest friends would have guessed who that person is by now). I liked this guy so much that I lowered myself just to make him happy. I did what he wanted & liked, never what I enjoyed but still, I hold on to him because in a very weird way, I believed we had a connection although we weren't even a couple. That continued for quite some time until one day I just had enough. I thought that if I was firm & I stuck to my principles and beliefs, he'd realized that I'm different, nothing like all the other girls he messed around with. I gave him an ultimatum & I demanded his respect. It didn't turn out like I expected & hoped, instead we lost contact ever since.”

That was an entry I wrote a year & three months back. Today I was granted with his latest news. News which was shocking but kind of expected coming from him. I wouldn’t say much about the news (demoralizing that’s the word) but what I can say is that he finally got what he deserved. Tempted as I was to taunt him with ‘serves u right’ & rubbing it in his face, deep down inside I feel sympathy for him because silly as it sounds I still care for this guy. But don’t call me foolish just yet, just because I care that doesn’t mean I want him back. Life had been tremendously great & I don’t intend to spoil it any time soon. He was my past & better he stays there. But what if I bump into him again u ask? Well, I’ll do the same thing I do every other time, exit using a different route. There’s no way I can control myself if I ever saw his face again. It’s better to stay away from temptations. Value your heart. Save it for someone who really deserves it.

the domestic side of me part II

U must be wondering what kept me so long from updating my last entry. Let me explain myself. I was distracted yet again (typical me) and I had to place my feminine side on the backseat for a while.

At night, fun (in the form of my friends) came up with a proposition hard for me to refuse I just had to say yes. We had a ‘wild nite’ (quoted from fieza) & wild it really was! I had the greatest time ever! Thanks so so much, guys! *muck*

The next day I had a mini reunion with a bunch of friends (lynn, anne, bobet, fieza & mus) from my boarding school years (1996-2000). We reminisced about the good old days & we laughed our hearts out til our eyes water & sides hurt. Those years were definitely the best years of my life. Period. Really looking forward for our next meet up so we could continue where we left off (laughter & more laughter!). :D

Now, back to topic (see how easily I get distracted) & here’s the cake I’ve been meaning to bake (refer last entry). It tastes good, a bit like ‘apam balik’ & I was beaming with pride when my whole family ate the whole plate I served. :)

Here’s the much anticipated (at least for me) PEANUT BUTTER CAKE WITH CHOCOLATE CHIPS. Yummy!

the domestic side of me

at the moment, i'm alternating back & forth between my blog & the web, choosing but still cant decide on what type of cake i'm going to bake later..

yes,i have been influenced by lynn (fellow blogger & bosom buddy) to bake my own cake. at the same time brings out the feminine side of me and to remind myself that i m not exactly THAT useless in the kitchen.. :D

after much scrutinizing, i've decided to try my hands in baking PEANUT BUTTER CAKE WITH CHOCOLATE CHIPS. chocolate+peanut butter=extreme sugar comma but I LOVE IT!

i'm off to buy the ingredients. will be back with the outcome later. hopefully it'll be presentable & most importantly edible. :)

raya 2008

::SELAMAT HARI RAYA AIDILFITRI::MAAF ZAHIR DAN BATIN::

i know,i know,i'm a little late for raya updates (maybe too late.sorry) but too much food & fun can really slow someone down. :)

sometimes it feels surreal that Ramadhan month had swiftly passed us by.and I can proudly say that i went through it without skipping a day from fasting.yes,that's right.i didn't experience the most dreaded time of the month in Ramadhan (but i haven't menopause,alright.haha..) so no 'puasa qada' for me. ;p

at first i wasn't really looking forward for Raya since I'm working the night shift on Raya's eve.just imagine,breaking fast in the office on the last day of Ramadhan.bummer..

but slowly the Raya mood seeped in and for someone (female especially) to 'tamat puasa' is very rare so just might as well celebrate right? :)the days to come are so much fun.lots & lots of food.FOOD AND FUN.what a great combination!

fun is definitely hard to explain unless u experience it yourself but i bet everyone had a great time during this Raya.

since I dont have the appropriate vocabulary to describe all the great time i had,I’ll just let these pictures tell everything.enjoy!

fieza & me (we both have a thing with taking pics in the car)

juzz & me - damn i look fat beside skinny her..:D

hot babes for grabs - just the middle two though coz the far left & right are taken.sorry guys..;p

friends for life
back left to right: me - sue -zilah
front left to right: bobet - juzz - fieza


notice fieza's baju Raya & mine look kinda similar? coz they are! :)


and we always wonder why we're still single? :)

we'll make models run for their money.as if! :)

really can't wait for next year's Raya.hopefully by then i would have someone to match all my baju Raya with.OMG i sound so pathetic.haha..